ANALYSIS
A new survey of Americans suggests that faith-driven families don’t just survive hardships, they often thrive in them. More importantly, it appears their faith — and the hardship — are both essential to their flourishing over time.
Few things are more difficult, or rewarding, than welcoming children through foster or adoptive care. Virtually every parent who’s embraced these choices will tell you it’s the hardest thing they’ve ever done.
Children come into foster care at no fault of their own, when social workers and courts find they aren’t safe in their homes. Only about 15% are removed due to verifiable abuse; but in virtually all cases, parental addiction, mental illness, domestic violence and/or other painful issues play a part. These kids have experienced things no one ever should, and healing can be a long and difficult journey.
So perhaps it’s little wonder that a person’s faith commitments strongly predict their willingness to get involved. New research commissioned by the Christian Alliance for Orphans (CAFO) surveyed more than 1,500 Americans of diverse backgrounds, digging into their experiences with foster care, adoption, and related needs.
The data reveals remarkable connections between faith and service of every kind. People of all major faiths are more likely to step into the lives of kids in foster care than those who identify as agnostic, atheist or no faith (also known as the religious “nones”).
People of Christian faith are especially likely to do so. Compared to “nones,” Christians are nearly twice as likely to adopt and more than three times more likely to foster.
They’re also more likely to donate money or goods for this work (45% versus 24%), and more than twice as likely to volunteer with nonprofits, help foster and adoptive families and aid struggling biological parents. Notably, the more devoted a person is to their faith, the more likely they are to do all these things.
These findings echo previous studies that consistently identify strong associations between private faith and public goods, from philanthropy to volunteerism.
But this new data also probes a deeper layer, perhaps the most intriguing part. Even amidst the serious struggles that often come with foster care and adoption, families that do so are significantly more likely than others to report they are thriving, especially religious families.
Among “nones” who’ve never fostered or adopted, less than 5% say they’re “flourishing.” For Christians who’ve fostered or adopted, that number rises four times to 20%. (Another 39% report they’re doing “pretty good,” compared to 28% of “nones”).
Those numbers reverse at the other end of the spectrum: 19% of “nones” place themselves in the worst-off group (“struggling”), with just 2% of Christians who’ve fostered or adopted saying the same. Although smaller, these gaps in wellbeing remain even between fellow Christians who either have or haven’t welcomed children in this way.
That doesn’t mean foster care and adoption are easy. They aren’t by any stretch. Might it be that healthy people are more likely to take on hard things? Or do hard experiences form healthy people?
I’ve seen both to be true. Over two decades serving in this field, I’ve observed that the life-altering decision to foster or adopt often flows from a distinctly whole-life kind of faith. It’s an entire ecosystem that includes earnest belief and daily practices of faith, a vibrant church community, willingness to sacrifice in answer to God’s call, and — in the long run — a visible flourishing.
The “flourishing” part of that picture sometimes feels far off, even laughable, for families in the trenches. But over time, those who don’t give up reap a beautiful harvest.
As a fellow adoptive parent put it to me, “It’s been brutal at times. But I wouldn’t give it up — not for anything. Our daughters needed us. And nothing in life, absolutely nothing, has done more to grow us all to be more like Jesus.”
This outlook cuts hard against the assumptions of our culture, which teaches daily that our greatest need is self-care, that difficult relationships are “toxic,” and that pain should be shunned like rattlesnakes. But after many years walking with families who’ve embraced both the good and the hard of adoption and foster care — and doing so myself as well — I’m confident that flourishing comes not only despite the hardships but in part because of them.
Indeed, that is precisely what our faith has always taught. Trials do cultivate perseverance, character, and hope. It is more blessed to give than to receive. And in the end, we only find our life by losing it.
Jedd Medefind serves as president of the Christian Alliance for Orphans (CAFO), an alliance of 300 organizations serving vulnerable children and families worldwide. He previously led the office of Faith-Based and Community Initiatives for President George W. Bush.